1yr Happy Easter

I was such a cute baby!

@MeowschwitzB is my twitter

Wishing all my fans a Joyous Easter

M

Splat

Dear Church,

Welcome to our family,  but heed my warning....
THIS is what happened to Blu when she tried to usurp my place.

and BOOM goes the dynamite

That's right I laid her out, so Church take note that I am the Queen B & you must be my minion. 

April Fools

I'm struggling to come up with the best April Fools prank on Blu. Usually I'd employ my vast intellect,  but she's a mind midget. Eureka! I'll put plastic food in her bowl w a dash of bacon grease n watch her go at it!

(Laughter)


Ill be sure to videotape it for all my loyal fans!

Frozen

I have no words. Loyal readers this is NOT me

(Clear by how FAT this designer imposter is)

This wannabe is the latest insult my human parents have thrust upon me. First snaggle-toothed Blu (whom is actually making an adequate minion) & now Church. I will begin training her via CIA. I have to go raid my 'nip stash I swore I would save for a celebration. They will pay

Follow me on Twitter @MeowschwitzB

I'm Baaaaacccckkkkk

Hi all, I've been undercover in an intense operation for the CIA (Cat Intelligence Agency). More than that I can't disclose at this time, however just know you're Meowschwitz is back in action!

Kisses

M

Blu's Twin

Am I the only one who sees the resemblance?! My sister is a dog in cats clothing I just know it! Grandma and Grandpa have that dog Elvis and both of them will stand and beg.....I have to send Blu's DNA through CIA's lab to figure this all out. Has something to do with Dixie I know this...more to follow.  Meow

UPDATE:

DNA ANALYSIS FROM CIA HAS DETERMINED BLU DOES HAVE DOG GENES. THIS DOESNT SURPRISE ME, HOWEVER AS LONG AS SHE OBEYS I WONT BLOW HER COVER.

MEOW

My Song 4 Mommy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=33mec03xeow&feature=youtube_gdata_player

She's an American Girl

Don't you agree Daddy?

Chupacabra aka My Sister

Finally she admits it!

Baby Brianna Summer

First off ... I ♥ my human mommy. She saved me from some crazy cat lady in Florida that named me Baby Brianna Summer (pauses to let name sink in with readers) Done?! Ok good. Now lets dissect everything that is wrong with that foulness.

Baby...at first glance nothing is wrong with that. Its cute I suppose, but how about once I'm grown....

Brianna.....I like this name but I have a problem with people naming their animals human names (no offense) get creative people! Even though mommy names her dogs after dead singers (Elvis & Selena) I forgive her.

Summer....ok now this is where I get confused. Why add summer to all that? Baby Brianna is bad enough but the addition of Summer makes me vom.....no offense (like I care)

Baby Brianna Summer = hot mess express. I never did come to that no matter how many times I'd be called that, but once I heard mommy call me Meowschwitz I knew I'd found my person!

HAPPY 4TH OF JULY

I decided for the fourth I'd make Daddy look festive....

For Blu's photo I decided to try and make her look decent. ..as you can see she's a lost cause...

As for mommy you can see the mothership has returned to take her home. Bye mommy I will miss you

Twitter. ..

Happy 4th to all my faithful readers out there.

Just want to remind everyone to follow me on twitter @meowschwitzb

Blu sans make up

Dixie Part Deux

To all my cat pals out there:

Further disturbing news from the front; another picture of this pedigree (YES I'm being snarky) daddy used to have.

Through extensive research at the CIA (for all you non-cats out there thats CAT INTELLIGENCE AGENCY) I have uncovered Dixie's true parentage and have her papers....though because of my non-disclosure agreement with the Agency I am not allowed to show these documents. 

Daddy has just entered the room....I must sign off post haste

Please check back soon as I will keep digging for the TRUTH 

Danger Zone

Blu

So my sister thinks if she puts a dress on she can mask the stench of gutter rat....

Such is NOT the case

But I suppose this is the first picture of you where you look sweet. 

Dixie The "Pedigree" Mutt....

So I was combing through Daddy's photo album. I fell asleep halfway through, but then I found this photo

I don't even know where to start...

Oh wait yes I do...

1. The goatee (throws up)

Then we'll move on to the "elephant" in the photo...that gross thing at his side.

He claims this THING is of pedigree and its name was "Dixie Due"....

I laughed so hard I don't even have the strength to properly make fun of him and that "pedigree" of a mutt he has in his arms. And to top it off he had her while living (hahah I said "had her") in West Hollywood. YUUUUUUUUUUUP. 

Baby Pictures

This is me when I was 3 months old....

Blu at who cares what age she is .... demon kitty

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Fat

Human daddy called me fat ... lets see who's the fat one

FAT DADDY WHEN HE WAS LITTLE

ADORABLE SLIM ME

Chewbacca

On The Road Again...

So my human family decided we're all driving from NY to LA (as in California) - I've been through this before...the driving I mean. BUT this cross country crap is too much for me! 

Cars = throw up 

Long drive + BLU = slow painful death

Well I've had it.....I did not get consulted when they brought Chewbacca into the house 

(TWINS SEPARATED AT BIRTH)