Monday, August 19, 2013

Blu's Twin

Am I the only one who sees the resemblance?! My sister is a dog in cats clothing I just know it! Grandma and Grandpa have that dog Elvis and both of them will stand and beg.....I have to send Blu's DNA through CIA's lab to figure this all out. Has something to do with Dixie I know this...more to follow.  Meow


Friday, July 19, 2013

My Song 4 Mommy
She's an American Girl
Don't you agree Daddy?

Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Chupacabra aka My Sister

Finally she admits it!

Baby Brianna Summer

First off ... I ♥ my human mommy. She saved me from some crazy cat lady in Florida that named me Baby Brianna Summer (pauses to let name sink in with readers) Done?! Ok good. Now lets dissect everything that is wrong with that foulness. first glance nothing is wrong with that. Its cute I suppose, but how about once I'm grown....

Brianna.....I like this name but I have a problem with people naming their animals human names (no offense) get creative people! Even though mommy names her dogs after dead singers (Elvis & Selena) I forgive her.

Summer....ok now this is where I get confused. Why add summer to all that? Baby Brianna is bad enough but the addition of Summer makes me offense (like I care)

Baby Brianna Summer = hot mess express. I never did come to that no matter how many times I'd be called that, but once I heard mommy call me Meowschwitz I knew I'd found my person!

Thursday, July 4, 2013


I decided for the fourth I'd make Daddy look festive....

For Blu's photo I decided to try and make her look decent. you can see she's a lost cause...

As for mommy you can see the mothership has returned to take her home. Bye mommy I will miss you

Twitter. ..

Happy 4th to all my faithful readers out there.

Just want to remind everyone to follow me on twitter @meowschwitzb

Monday, June 17, 2013

Dixie Part Deux

To all my cat pals out there:

Further disturbing news from the front; another picture of this pedigree (YES I'm being snarky) daddy used to have.

Through extensive research at the CIA (for all you non-cats out there thats CAT INTELLIGENCE AGENCY) I have uncovered Dixie's true parentage and have her papers....though because of my non-disclosure agreement with the Agency I am not allowed to show these documents. 

Daddy has just entered the room....I must sign off post haste
Please check back soon as I will keep digging for the TRUTH 

Tuesday, June 4, 2013


So my sister thinks if she puts a dress on she can mask the stench of gutter rat....
Such is NOT the case

But I suppose this is the first picture of you where you look sweet. 

Dixie The "Pedigree" Mutt....

So I was combing through Daddy's photo album. I fell asleep halfway through, but then I found this photo

I don't even know where to start...
Oh wait yes I do...
1. The goatee (throws up)

Then we'll move on to the "elephant" in the photo...that gross thing at his side.
He claims this THING is of pedigree and its name was "Dixie Due"....
I laughed so hard I don't even have the strength to properly make fun of him and that "pedigree" of a mutt he has in his arms. And to top it off he had her while living (hahah I said "had her") in West Hollywood. YUUUUUUUUUUUP. 

Baby Pictures

This is me when I was 3 months old....

Blu at who cares what age she is .... demon kitty

Tuesday, May 28, 2013


On The Road Again...

So my human family decided we're all driving from NY to LA (as in California) - I've been through this before...the driving I mean. BUT this cross country crap is too much for me! 

Cars = throw up 
Long drive + BLU = slow painful death

Well I've had it.....I did not get consulted when they brought Chewbacca into the house 


Wednesday, April 24, 2013


If I had my own newspaper this photo would be on the front page.....

Headline would read: 


Text would be as follows and be written in the style of a DEAR JOHN letter to my "sis"

Dear Blu,
          I know its rough when you're a mind midget so I'll help you by removing the grate BUT you have to do yourself and the world a huge favor and JUMP IN once its removed. Really its nothing personal - I'm only thinking of YOU. I know, I know - you are amazed at my selflessness.....I amaze myself sometimes BUT thats not the end to my giving. No sir, once you have jumped in I will also selflessly put the grate back on the vent so our human parents won't get mad at you. Wait I have to go now - its the Pope calling me to anoint me into Sainthood.

Happy Trails

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Snaggle Toothed Creature


She's my "sister"....human daddy brought her into the house while human mommy was in the hospital. I blame her for getting sick; daddy rides the short bus. 
...Reasons Blu Needs To Die.....
1. She breaths
2. She tries to eat my food
3. She's trying to get mommy to love her more - good luck Blu
4. She won't STOP meowing....GET HER FIXED HUMANS!
5. She has poor breeding (read: gutter rat), I'm a Bengal (read: expensive - like my tastes)     
6. Just look at her picture ......